The Night before…

imgp0804.jpgIt’s the night before the “last night”. I know its coming, but that doesn’t make it any easier. I know there are mil-wives out there whose husbands deploy and leave straight from work without a goodbye. I have heard stories about going out to sea for a 3 day run only to return 3 months later….which has happened to my DH, but before I met him.

Here are some questions I’ve pondered lately: Do I spend every waking moment with him in the days before he leaves? Do I take off work? (Which for me, I work from home so to shut the door to the office can be difficult.) Do I make sure my son has “one on one” time? Am I secretly avoiding the commissary so I don’t have to shop for one less?

Today, it worked out that he and LilK went to the golf course while I went to the mall. I didn’t need anything and I didn’t feel like shopping, but there I was wandering around trying to find a good sale at Pottery Barn and Bombay Co. The distraction helped, however I came home empty handed.

On the last night we plan on going out to dinner at the husbands favorite restaurant. Normally, we would cook and stay in, but a 50% off coupon from Texas de Brazil he just can’t resist.

It’s almost time. He is packed. Last minute trip to the cigar store – check, travel size shampoo and toothpaste – check, new paperback book for the plane ride – check…..

The choices we make…..this one has been a tough one.

Do you have any deployment rituals? How do you handle the day or two before “he leaves”?

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4 Responses to “The Night before…”


  1. 1 National Guard Wife 4 September, 2007 at 10:24 pm

    We always gather Hubby’s stuff the few weeks before and then stay up the night before to pack and chat. We even do this for the two week traing he has to do every year. I alo write a card or letter to Hubby detailing how much I love him and why. The Kiddos chose to hang out with us the night before or spend the night with someone else to have somethng fun to look forward too. That is about the only things we do around here as a couple the last few days. The month before hand I kick into high gear setting up trusted friends to help with Kiddos and ones I know I can vent to without worring that they think I am crazy.

  2. 2 Ann M. 5 September, 2007 at 9:59 am

    The only real routine that we have is that I pack his bag for him and sneak a note in it. We usually go out to dinner sometime before he goes, too, and I cook his favorite meal at some point. But the day before he goes, we usually spend it doing last minute errands and being really tense. He hasn’t deployed all that much until recently, so we’re really bad at this. This trip was the first time that we didn’t have a huge fight in the day or so before he left. THAT was super nice.

  3. 3 LMT 6 September, 2007 at 9:39 am

    We do family time with the kids for the entire day and all cook and eat dinner together. He tucks them in one last time, reads them a long book, snuggles and anwers any questions they still have. Then we pull out the military stuff, he can’t stand to pack or load gear in front of the kids when he is leaving for a long period of time, so we do it after they are in bed. When all is packed and ready, we snuggle up and tend to just hold onto each other and talk until we fall asleep, b/c we lie there knowing that neither of us has any idea when we will really be able to wrap our arms around each other again. We just stand still in the last moments we have at home – for as long as possible.

  4. 4 Wendy 9 September, 2007 at 11:04 pm

    NGW, Anne & LMT – Those last few hours, moments are really so precious…..not fully realized until the moment is gone. Its almost like wanting to freeze frame time. It’s so great to hear what you guys do in those moments….. Thanks for sharing.


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